Day 1, Rotation 5

Was initially very happy when I arrived at my new clinic home. The preceptor is a long-time PA who takes on a lot of students and seems to genuinely enjoy teaching. He sat down with me for a few minutes to talk shop, and even mentioned that he would be teaching me the art of medicine more than the science of it, which I was thrilled to hear.

Then the day got started.

I observed one appointment with him before I was doing them on my own and just presenting. That part is fine - I can appreciate not having my hand held. But then he seemed to just get stressed out and was not quite as friendly as he had been at the beginning of the day. Not mean, but just short with me, especially when I forgot something, (gasp, on my first day? Unacceptable.)

Finally, the end of the day came, and he turns to me and says, "well...that was an okay first day."

I realize that "okay" isn't "horrible," but I thought it was an extremely successful first day, considering I was pretty much left to my own devices. (Yes, I made mistakes, but I also did a lot of good stuff too).

Then he starts talking about how it will be most helpful to us both if I can do my own progress notes. I say that I agree, and that I think I got them done for all the patients I saw.
He says "oh you got a start on them all? That's good, that will help you to finish them later."
I respond, "Oh, well...they're actually already finished."
He looked at me like I was lying, or I must have written the most piece of crap notes ever to have gotten them done already.

We have Tuesday mornings off, but he says he will be in to do his own charting and review my notes and "clean them up." I thank him and say that I welcome his criticisms and suggestions, (which I actually do...not many preceptors have taken the time to critique my notes).

Now, a good portion of the reason why I am not happy with this whole first day is that I am a perfectionist and really wanted it to be an "excellent" first day, rather than an "okay" one. I also realize that I tend to take things the wrong way, and it is entirely possible that I am being too sensitive. I am going to try my hardest to make today better than yesterday.

Jen